Wednesday, October 21, 2009

Chivalry, Ladies, Is Not Rude

Yes, we are women hear us roar. Yes, sisters are doing it for themselves. Yes, our mystique is feminine. But hey, ladies, get funky. And by that I clearly mean, please don’t be offended by chivalrous acts.

A man who opens a door for you or pulls out your chair or offers to carry your grocery is rarely doing it because he thinks you are incapable. He’s probably being nice, or at minimum he’s doing it because chivalry has been ingrained in him by his mother, which is pretty sweet if you think about it. If you are looking for men to view as misogynist swine, chivalrous gentlemen should be the last on your list. That guy who lets the door slam on your face is the one who doesn’t view you as a human being worthy of his time.

If you take offense at an innocent act of chivalry and reprimand the guy for performing it, you not only risk embarrassing him and making him feel bad but you piss off me and other women who appreciate such gestures and who may not get to enjoy them because you have now convinced this guy that it’s not worth it because women just get mad. Seriously, if a guy is willing to open my door, move my sofa, or pay for my meal, I think it’s wonderful. Don’t f*ck that up for me! Say “thank you” and get on with your day of ball-crushing dominance.

(Full disclosure: I happen to be married to a rather chivalrous gentleman.)

1 comment:

red pen mama said...

Here's my take: chivalry shouldn't be limited to men. A person should hold the door for the person behind them. If someone needs help with her/his bags, the someone else should offer said help. Certain things (pulling out a chair, opening a car door) may be primarily the man's responsibility. But really, I just think we should all be nice to each other, and helpful. (I'm from Pittsburgh.)


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